Decadence was born three days after Christmas. This was eight days later than the projected arrival, which is how Decadence justifies her need to arrive to an event "fashionably late." Celebrating a birthday during this time of year takes persistence, patience, and creativity as people are always out of town or having family time or hungover from other celebrations occurring around the big day. This alternately means that the people that are available to celebrate the most magical of days are usually fully ready and willing to make it an event to end all events. This endeavor is always successful.
While briefly recounting a few memories that remain of celebratory occasions, this post will also present lessons learned in association with a sort of photo montage of people and things that may or may not have been involved...
The person pictured here (sometimes referred to as Diesel or BranFlakes) missed one of said birthday festivities due to a suspicious "illness." It should however be noted that in this picture, she had the right mindset.
Lesson learned: Careful mental and physical preparation should begin weeks before the birthday celebration so as not to fall ill just before or during said celebration, this will result in regret.
These two were present for one of the wilder celebrations: Lindsey ClAArk and BAArbKiller (shown here in full SAAdom). During their presence at one birthday celebration they brought a birthday cake and then while Decadence was outside talking to another party attendee, they ate most of the cake before others could enjoy it. Then due to their overindulgence, one became ill in the night.
Lesson learned: If someone brings a birthday cake, hide it or the assholes will eat it.
Cats dressed like lobsters are never involved...actually cats in general are never involved unless they run in front of the party crew as they roam the streets.
Lesson learned: Don't bring your cat to the party, he/she is not invited.
During one celebration many years ago, one nameless guest was seen peeing on cars much like these. Luckily the officers patrolling the streets did not witness this, but the same guest was later arrested for other reasons that did not include peeing on or attempting to drive a car.
When these events are in the planning stages, transportation is always arranged whether this means a van cab is arranged for the night, a designated driver is chosen, or the party never leaves the place where it began. At times this system has failed and Decadence could think of no better option than attempting to make a 2 mile trek home (two separate attempts) after being left by party attendees for undetermined reasons.
Lesson learned: Stay away from cars during Decadence birthday celebrations unless a responsible person is driving and that person is not an officer of the law.
Lesson learned addendum: Do not leave Decadence alone on her birthday without transportation, she will make new friends but refuse their offers to provide her with ride home.
Occasionally it rains on the day of Decadence's birth, however this sort of weather will not be tolerated. This man had an appropriate response to ill-willed rain.
Lesson learned: Always have an appropriate response.
In the aftermath of such occasions, there is pain of various sorts. Headaches, inexplicable bruises and cuts, broken finger nails, stubbed toes, missing patches of skin, indigestion, upset stomachs, periods of chills and/or hot flashes, and sore stomach muscles from laughing are on par for an aftermath episode. During one aftermath bruise inventory session, Decadence complained of a sore shoulder. When BarbKiller was asked to inspect this spot, it was discovered that Decadence had been bitten. Vampire? No. This was a human bite, a human with straight, even teeth who had such biting power that they left top and bottom teeth marks, many teeth even breaking the skin. Determining the culprit of this misdeed became the great mystery of 2007 (you may have read/heard about this in the major news outlets). An official report was never filed, but the SAAs on the case felt quite certain that they found the violator.
Lesson learned: Do not bite Decadence.
Additional lesson learned: Plan for the aftermath.
Reviewing these lessons learned from past events helped Decadence successfully navigate through this year's birthday celebration with ease. There is the aftermath to contend with, but such is life.
